Seriously, can we talk about spiritual white folks, especially white women, for a moment?


There is a series of tropes of these women and quite frankly, each of them, is dangerous to womxn and people of color.


I was recently in a discussion with a group of poc and someone started to mention ‘a spiritual white woman.’ Cue collective eye roll. Cue rage. Cue stepping into our power. No more is needed for our imaginations to fill in our most recent encounter with one of these women and the harm that we have suffered at their hands.


They take OUR cultures, OUR practices, OUR traditions and use them as COSTUMES. They PROFIT from it. And then, when it’s inconvenient they can discard the whole image. When wrapped together with LOA or other white washed spirituality, it becomes infinitely more oppressive. I’ll touch on those tropes later in the series.


While we walk around in these yellow, brown and black bodies and face a daily ONSLAUGHT of racism and fear for our lives and our safety. And if we bring up our cultures, our practices, we are harmed at worse, ignored which is generally neutral, and tokenized at best. And in this world, neutral means often siding with the oppressor.


To say that this feels me with rage is an understatement. My belly burns when I see this and other spiritual white women tropes in action. And when I see fellow poc being hurt or thrown under the bus to protect these ww, the gloves come off.


In this series, I hope to walk you through some of the common tropes of spiritual white women and the unintentional, and intentional harm done through their work. These tropes are very much based on real women that I have encountered. While I can name names, it is more the trope that I am interested to share at this time. In the future, depending on how this goes, we’ll talk about real people in this space, name names of those causing harm.


Initially, I was writing to ww. But I have reconsidered that stance. I now write to protect poc and marginalized individuals from further harm. We see a sheen of ‘goodness’ or we believe the hype. We get sucked in. Then inevitably we get hurt. We incur more harm, on top of the lifetimes of pain we have already endured and been passed down from our ancestors. Without further ado…


Trope # 1 The White Yoga Teacher


I recently met a (white) English woman who could easily be classified as spiritual. For simplicity I’ll call her ‘S’, but pay attention to the trope. ‘S’ was a wearing a flowing dress that needless to say, came from the Indian subcontinent. She is a yoga teacher and healer. She was expressly there (at a retreat) to teach movement, a type of yoga, meditation and perhaps some of her ‘healing’ that seemed to be a collection of practices from all over the world. She taught this ‘womb’ yoga. The type of yoga here is irrelevant. It was presented as if ‘S’ herself had created it. And the entire introduction of herself and the work, centered on her and her situation. She briefly asked if there were health conditions to be aware of. And she gave 3 rules. The first was ‘ahimsa’, which is a Sanskrit word for a non-violent approach or nonviolence. She said comparing your ability to others or pushing yourself past your own comfort were forms of this. I honestly can’t remember the other two rules. She started the yoga. Womb yoga, without introduction to the materials, to its source, the specific practice and its history, just the movements with a white washed ‘gathering womb energy’ type of guidance. From the start I had reservations. I did actively participate for about 15 minutes, but within minutes my attention was waning and my rage growing. I chose to sit out the rest of the class. She continued in this vein for 50+ minutes.


Later, after the class. I was open to a discussion, as was she. She listened to some of what I share below. We left it in a positive place, (from my perspective). Yet, unfortunately, this individual chose to leave the retreat and did not clarify what had happened to the other participants. Neither did the retreat host (but that is another story completely). The burden fell to me and as a result, I bore the brunt of the negative response that followed. This last part is a typical response to such situations after being called out. This happens in both online and offline.


Let me unpack this for you.


Note, it was quite literally a costume that could be discarded. She was living in Europe, so she could have donned clothes from that area but chose not to. There are also a great many English or western textiles and fashions to choose from as well.


Secondly, these clothes were no doubt made from cheap, unfair trade labor from somewhere in the Indian subcontinent. I don’t know if you have visited some of these areas, but impoverished is a kind way to put it. Clean running water (into the home), toilets, and consistent electricity are regular issues. Every time you choose fast fashion, know that some brown or black individual is doing this labor for pennies on the dollar, compared to the minimum wage in Western countries.


Thirdly, the cotton or other fabrics are damaging the planet. Cotton farming esp in Andhra, where my father is from is huge. It’s a cash crop. It’s a labor intense crop to harvest and requires a great deal of water to grow. With the advent of GM cotton, these farmers are not able to preserve their old ways, ie seed saving. They are running into huge debts that can’t be paid and are committing suicide. Family lands are sold to paid down debts and like farmers around the world, the next generation often leaves the rural areas in search of jobs, education and better prospects. Often replaced by monoculture and agribusiness style farms that deplete soils and profit multinationals, not small farmers.


Other fabrics, rayon and so, are synthetic. They are by and large made from petroleum products. (It’s a cool lab experiment often done in organic chemistry experiments, the former science teacher in me says). But I hear you say, what about bamboo? Well after the initial processing, it behaves very much like rayon. Fairtrade, organic, and sustainable fabrics like tencel and hemp are better, but best to check into the supply chains so there is accountability throughout.


Climate change, too, has ravaged these areas (and other areas predominately inhabited by blacks and browns) rather than those causing the most damage in the (white) west. Basically, it causes more pain, death, and discomfort to bipoc worldwide. These individuals often with the least resources (because of wealth extraction from capitalism, colonialism and greed), do not have the means to move, survive, put up sea walls and other protections from the ravages of climate change.


Next, let us not forget, the British came to India via colonization. The takeover was violent and forever changed the Indian Subcontinent and its history. It’s a bloody history. Make no mistake, it was done to claim, to take, to steal wealth for the British Empire. It was not kind. And when people continue to profit from the plundering, it is not just cultural appropriation, but grotesque stealing. And then parading it around as if to say, ‘try and stop me.’


I want to add here, gems, like many found in the crown jewels are stolen from the ‘empire’ and even after returning their countries, they still hold on to these items. Tokens from their plundering ways. And just like those, the rich textiles, culinary masterpieces, and ways of being are kept in the same vein. And in modern times, such mechanisms are still in force as is the racism worldwide against these individuals and their diaspora. This teacher (as do many) failed to notice or acknowledge this part of history and the ongoing narrative.


White bodies are also revered in these places. It’s a direct impact of colonialism. Colorism, the discrimination of peoples based on shades of skin color is real in colonized countries. The lighter the skin, the more acceptable. Many skin bleaching creams on the markets and the trope of lighter skin equalling more attractive is alive and well. Then when, white people do yoga, they are playing directly on this trope.


Further, though I don’t all the history of yoga, but I have done an in-depth inquiry into Bharata Natyam (and the change in rhetorical situation as a direct result of colonization) for my M.A. in Rhetoric and for the Ph.D. that I did not complete. I also have been trained as a Bharata Natyam dancer since the age of 4. There are certain parallels between the arts of India. Like many of the arts of India, as a direct result of Victorian morals, began the downfall and whitewashing of many of the arts. Meanwhile, whites would come to observe (and steal) these arts. Sometimes they came to learn (and pay) the teachers to learn. Then they had a history of doing these performances in the US and UK (among other places) for pay, bringing the it to the West. It is part of the history of Orientalism — the love of the exotic East tinged with imperialism of the West.
There is a lineage with in the arts.

All of them, including dance and yoga, have a lineage. The chain of guru-shishya (shishya= student) is how the art is passed down. Without acknowledging my gurus in both Carnatic Music and Bharata Natyam, I am doing a disservice and in fact, I am insulting those who came before me. Without acknowledging this tradition, her gurus, the lineage, the style and so on, she is disrespecting the entire this tradition and those who have come before her.


Not to mention, the guru-shishya relationship (as any teacher/student) relationship, involves a hierarchy, a power differential. That needs to be understood and acknowledged. There is often power on both sides, but when race, gender, ability, education, age and so on are not addressed, it creates an unsafe space. There are more about power dynamics of teachers, I have seen and been a part of as an educator for 8+ years in the classroom. Once again, this power differential went unmentioned.


Also, there is maleness in yogic traditions (as well as other arts). These were often Brahmin men practicing these ancient techniques and they were not shared with the masses. These men often withheld this wisdom from the other castes and from womxn. Inherent in that is classism. A classism reflected in the Western Yogic practice, with white teachers, primarily middle or upper class white women in attendance, lack of support or systems to include the marginalized, and little to no teaching that reflects the true history of the art itself.


And with the advent of colonialism, arts like Bharata Natyam that were a low caste art that died and reborn from its ashes, was a turned from temple art reserved for a specific (low) caste to a high-class stage art. Once again using classism to erase and marginalize those whose life blood and lineage build the art in the first place. I do not know the impacts on colonialism on yoga specifically, but I’m sure that too was impacted. This is a place for further inquiry on my end. But as temple dancing was banned during British rule, many other arts (even yoga and Ayurveda according to one source) were banned as well.


Erasure and marginalization of WOC is true. Men, often free of the burden of children, could pursue such a life of the ascetic. And often benefited from the women’s labor for sure. My own paternal grandfather, a Brahmin male, upheld the rules that women were of less value and benefited from their labor. I am not sure how this happened in ancient India, but I am sure of it did happen. According to the Samskaras (Hindu text of religious customs), of which I have only read parts, traditions like the men naming their children, the number of days and actions of defilement (days of mourning) vary greatly for men and women as well as class, and childcare/food preparation done primarily by women. Another gap in my education on how these systems impacted the yogic traditions. Also, Brahmins perhaps had means (and duty) to send their sons away to learn the Vedas and other Hindu traditions that women would be been denied (and in fact, girls seen as a burden for marriage and needed at home to do domestic chores at least in more modern times).


It was not until individuals like the students of Sri Tirumalai Krishnamacharya or Yogi Bhajan, brought it out to the West (and hence the world) in the 1950’s and later. Then the academics had their hand in it, bringing it to the West to those types attracted and privileged to attend universities. Once again, not accessible to many based in India or poc around the world. The ability to have travel to India and pay to learn these techniques is a badge of honor for many whites.


Worth noting here: Yoga in the West is devoid of Hindu thought or principles. It is taken as a simple movement. Sometimes, as in the words of Alexis P. Morgan, ‘spiritual bleach’ a whitened version of the Hindu spiritual principles. Without the culture, the respect, the deeper understanding of the practices themselves, it is very sanitary, devoid of the true essence. Yoga is more than a movement or asana. It is a lifestyle and a way of being, deeply rooted in the teachings of the Vedas.
An aside. Though Brahmins are traditionally vegetarian, those practices are hard to maintain outside of India. Because of the monoculture of agriculture and CAFO for dairy operations instead of the permaculture and holistic farm practices, eating the way they ate and maintained their body is unavailable in the West. Meaning bite for bite, food grown in nourished soils, heirloom varieties, Ayurvedic and other ancient cooking techniques and ingredients, maximize nutritional content of food. Being vegetarian in this way and shaming those that are not, cannot is unfair. This is another element of the trope. Often these individuals are vegetarian or vegan and push their ideas on others, whose constitutions or belief systems or budget will not accommodate this are shamed.


Womb yoga. It also undermines those who have had hysterectomies or unable to have children, and individuals who have gone through menopause. It inherently excludes individuals that may identify as womxn but do not have a womb. That last part in itself is considered TERF, a type of feminism that excludes transwomen. Inclusion is an important element to consider here. While this space had only cis women, as far as I knew, it did subtly elevate those who had a womb and had actively had used it for childbearing.


After generations of abuse, there is a PTSD from colonization. A type of internalized oppression that is passed down from generation to generation. It’s an ancestral wound that continues to fester. And the flames of rage that come from this and repeated racism/sexism that is inherent for WOC, is a perfect storm to create a rage when faced with this type of spiritual white woman. And after generations of being silenced, it is difficult to learn to speak up. If this has happened to you, forgive yourself for your lack of eloquence, your seething rage, your silence, your inability to communicate your point or any other feelings/expressions.


When confronted, this type of woman will appear to listen and speak from compassion. They will center the discussion on them and their feelings to distract. And ultimately, to avoid a scene they will back away and leave you with their typical, ‘love and light’ comments. We’ll discuss this more in another piece. Notice certain features, marginalization by omission of power structures, histories, and lineage, lack of in-depth understanding of names, positions, and larger contexts, a centering behaviour both inside and outside the classroom. In general, they avoid going in depth, avoid politics, and avoid anything vibrationally, ‘heavy’. They have a superficial understanding of Hinduism and the teaching therein. When confronted, they have a tendency to disappear. This lack of acknowledgement and erasure causes undo harm to the POC they marginalize.


An interesting aside. A WOC challenged me afterward saying, ‘does that mean every time they teach a class, they should say yoga is from India?’ in a rather condescending tone. Here in defence of the white yoga teacher. This is internalized oppression, once again for another day to discuss.


What can you do?


If you are a POC or marginalized individual here are some ideas to take this deeper.


Keep your eyes open for common themes. Our great leader, Audre Lorde, makes an excellent point (in the quote above) about draining our power, resources, and so on. As People of Color, it’s our job to refocus that energy back on ourselves. One way to do this is to start to name these tropes. Unpack and see exactly how white supremacy, toxic behaviors, and marginalization happens, as to be able to see it clearly for what it is, be judicious with our energies and circle, and learn to dismantle our own programming. Part of that journey is to reclaim our heritage, cultures and re-center ourselves in our lives.
Secondly, tell stories and share your experiences bravely.


And, if you have a story of harm created from spiritual ww, I’ll provide an hour of my time to listen to you to process. If you’d like help to write the story, share your story in anyway or just process the trauma in a safe space. I’m here for it. Just reach out and we’ll set up the time. Info@manifestbydesign.com is the best place to reach me. And its completely free service.

Let’s turn the tables on these WW.


1) Take POC led classes. When possible, take courses like yoga from poc first. If you are unable to find one after truly looking, find the most knowledgeable white one in your area and inquire about these power structures and culture before joining to gauge receptivity.

2) Listen. Listen to woc/poc and learn about their own cultures, histories/herstories, spiritual practices, and how they have been experienced injustice at the intersection of feminism and racism. And then pay them for their time.
3) If you learned from these words or the resulting thread/comments then pay me. Here’s the link: paypal.me/manifestbydesign.com
4) If you want to support a marginalized individual or poc to work with me so they can follow their calling and do their work in the world. I’d love to have you support me, so I can support them. Ask me how you can do this.
5) Spiritual white women and men. I’d love to help you do this work, if you’re willing to listen. We can use the time together to look into your own actions, perceptions, marketing copy, sales process, or course curriculum. A minimum of 5 hours of work is recommended.
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Resources for further study:
http://www.decolonizingyoga.com/decolonize-yoga-practice/
http://www.decolonizingyoga.com/yoga-hate-6-ways-to-end-exclusion-in-yoga/
http://www.decolonizingyoga.com/when-people-of-color-say-they-want-their-own-yoga-white-people-should-listen/
https://yogainternational.com/article/view/why-we-practice-a-short-history-of-yoga-in-the-west

Women are supposedly paid 75 cents on the dollar for men's work. Yet, this refers to white men and women. Evidence shows that people of color, women especially, are paid far less. Similarly, individuals with disabilities and GLBTQIA+, depending on the situation quite possibly suffer the same.

And all the while, money is concentrating into few hands. The wealth being siphoned from the poorest to the wealthiest. These elites do this intentionally through the media, corporations, institutions, and governments, the long arms and talking pieces, controlling the situation from behind the scenes.

While we do our best to speak up and break through the glass ceilings and systems of oppression, it's a real thing.

The majority of even 'middle class' families can barely keep a month's expenses aside for a rainy day. One bad month away from poverty. More and more individuals live below the poverty line, services cut, real buying power decreasing, and wages stagnating.
While world-wide, charitable donations are up. Fewer people live in deep poverty. Many billionaires and millionaires give very generously through philanthropic causes. Yet, they too have not managed to upend the systematic oppression, partially because they ultimately benefit from it.

Individuals growing up in poverty and living in an unequal society (I.e. living with racism, sexism, ageism etc.) creates a shell shock to the brain and epigenome. We know that epigenetics impacts quality of life and is stored as ancestral wounds. We've lived in 500+ years of colonialism and globalization. For generations, this oppressive system have lived on in our DNA, our stories, our histories. Yet all of this is largely unacknowledged or paid lip service to in sensitivity or diversity training.

There is no leaving. No escape hatches. No back door. Nowhere to go, even if you wanted to do so.

I'm not saying that we must accept this situation. I'm not saying to hate the privileged and wealthy. I'm not saying that all hope is lost.

What I am saying it that we do live in an unequal society. It's not just your imagination.
What I am saying is that privileged folks have had generations to preserve and accumulate wealth.

What I am saying is that the current economic, social, and political climate gives an advantage to some, not all.

What I am saying is that even if you make less, your bills and needs are not less. In fact, the marginalized have layers of programming and ancestral wounds to heal in addition to their current circumstances.

I'm getting tired of individuals within the personal growth industry, especially whites, who ignore these factors of inequality in their pricing, sales and marketing practices.
I'm tired of inflated prices and the shaming in not being able to afford the investment without putting individuals and families at risk from debt.

I'm tired of people profiting from fear based messages and yielding very little transformation. And many feel shame about speaking out against such messaging or services.

I'm tired of the deaf ear towards these injustices.

This is to say nothing of the actual program materials and approach that often perpetuates oppression and further marginalizes the marginalized.
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When we ignore the truth and deny reality, we cause harm. When the very nature of our so-called empowerment does not actually liberate, but further subjugate, we are doing damage. Here is a reminder: IMPACT>INTENT.

Just stop and listen.

And if you are marginalized, know that in my space you are safe.
I do not pretend that I know all. I have consciously worked unceasingly to unpack my own wounds, from colonialism through my inquiry into patriarchy within my own life and the impact of the British empire within India, related to Bharata Natyam. I have spent the past 20 years teaching, writing, editing, consulting about remembering and recovering identity, illuminating purpose, and defining life on your terms. I personally unschooling my daughter. I am a business owner. I have lived the struggles of being a brown body in a white washed world. And I have a unique blend of science-based tools to illuminate truth and gentility of compassion and deep listening that leads to radical transformation.

My promise to you: walk with you through the dark days, recover who you are, and rewrite the programs to take back your full potential and step fully into your power. If you're ready, I'm here.

Here's a video lecture that I created about overcoming systemic oppression in regards to living your life by design and fulfilling your calling. Check it out and I will open my calendar for a heart to heart discussion with me -- no strings attached to connect about this and the impact on your life and journey. If you are looking for support, we can discuss that as well.

Video Lecture link. 

One of the places that our power is dissipated is through forgetting and losing our cultural context and identity. Reclaiming who you are, your whole self is crucial to the journey to your power.


Our culture in the western world is difficult to maintain. The indigenous cultures are by and large ignored, destroyed while the dominant 'culture' or lack of culture is maintained. In this context, we've forgotten who we really are. A big part of recovering this is finding our ancestral nature as humans and our cultural identity.


We push our physical movements into the small space of counting our steps or going to the gym. But ancestral movement was varied and overall more 'nutritious' like squatting, carrying water, foraging and hunting and farming. It included building, entertainment, defence.


Our foods have become morphed by processing, with the interest of increasing shelf life and profitability, not nutritional status, environmental sustainability, or fair living wages for workers. Instead our ancestors, lived from the land, they understood the cycles of time, the nuances of the connectivity of living things and natural cycles. Foods would have been local, nutritionally dense, and valued--nothing thrown away.


Family life was not just limited to the nuclear family and relatives for national holidays, it was a way of life. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins were all a part of everyday life: child care, cooking, education, were shared responsibilities. Also protection, food, and connection were for the benefit of all in the tribe.
Education was not merely sitting in a school room with a book. But was varied, the school room was the foraging done with a mother, the babysitting done by a cousin or older sibling, the hunting of game, the learning of farming and subsistence with your community, the passing on of teachings through oral stories, songs, traditions and dancing.


In these and in hundreds of other ways, we have allowed ourselves to be sold a lie, a manufactured, easy, shadow version of who we are as people, as individuals, as a collective. It's no longer wonder that we have collectively lost our ways. It's not taught, not role modelled and purposely dismissed in the mainstream culture. But that is our true nature.


Instead of culture being separated by a music appreciation class in school or an evening at the theatre, or an 'ethnic' dinner out with friends or a Zumba dance class, let's make it a part of our everyday.
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We have externalized our culture, just like we have externalized our utilities, our movement, our entertainment, our relationships, our food, our labor, our identities and our education. It's time to integrate them back into our very essence. Recovering yourself in these ways is not only essential but transformative.


Before you leap into this, get very clear on who you are and where you came from. By this, I do not mean merely your culture, ethnicity, race or location. I mean, where we came from as humans. What you stand for as a person. Why you're here now. What is the greater meaning to your life.


Yes, parts of our own personal histories and herstories have been lost, just as those of the collective and the marginalized. Yet, they can be recovered. It's easier to do that now before they truly do disappear. Start by dipping your toe.
Beyond the personal, you can find out about your relations, your family, your heritage. You can learn the language of your ancestors, if it indeed still exists. You can recover the art, drama, dance, and creative expressions. You can rediscovery native foods, flavors, textures, garb and fragrances. You can allow yourself to learn the old ways, the old stories, the old movements.


It's a bold move and one that centers your life around you, instead of in the dominant culture that alienates you and separates you from community and yourself.


Take the courageous steps to rediscover who you are.

A magnet has the power to realign molecules to their true north.
When exposed to heat, some metals lose their magnetic quality, each molecule acting higgledy-piggledy and pointing in random directions.

Rubbing a magnet along the metal, realigns the molecules and once again they point true north, lining up with the magnet's field.

Just like that, heat in the form of stress, oppression, injustice, and experiences can help us to forget our own alignment.

Alignment with who you are, with why you are here, with the patterns and nuances of your life and experience, with your strengths and gifts, and your spiritual nature. Discovering or rediscovering who you are is a gift, a treasure. Being in alignment with your true nature bolsters you in times of change or stress.

When you know who you are, what you stand for, and focus on your priorities, things become simpler. You know exactly what your boundaries are. You know what you came here to do and tune out all else. You know clearly who and what to ally with and who to distance yourself from. You remember your life's work. You can recontextualize your life accordingly in times of strive or change. Keeping your eyes on your priorities and what you are here to do.

What you're here to do does make a difference. Can change the world. But it's crucial to not get swept away by the agendas of others and stuck in your old patterns.
Welcome to your life. That challenge that keeps showing up in a myriad of ways won't go away. It's not here for you to strategize your way out of. It's not here to mock you. It's not here to limit you.

It's here to learn from. To overcome, rewrite, reframe.

It reminds you, grounds you in your reality. As you learn to rise above, you take your life back into your own hands. You concentrate your power around yourself.

At times of flux, it's good to hang on to that north star and realign with yourself. Not much else might be there that is true and static, but who you are remains. That is real. That can guide you and keep you safe on turbulent waters.

When people work with me in the Discover services, they say that I realign them. That I bring a light into their darkness. That it's like I open a window when the doors were closing. It's a window cleaning that allows their light to shine out into the depths. They see, with clarity, who they are, why they came and resolve and inspiration to make forward progress. For the first time in a while, they are seeing the truth, with eyes wide open. They see the struggles before them in a new way.

A new confidence emerges. Doubts, overwhelm, loneliness, and struggles remain but start to fade. A new perspective and insight emerges. A lightness. A channel of power. A newfound self-respect and inner knowing emerges. A liberation of identification with struggle and disempowerment, but a generative energy to lean into the possibilities and identification with their calling.

Is it time to rediscover your truth and realign with your calling? Check out our discover services. 

You know, in every field I've worked in, from research, to education, to environmental activism, to editing, and small business ownership, I have faced a continual low-level racism. I have seen very Asian or darker skinned women in leadership roles or those of authority.


I have been rejected and seen my own parents rejected from bonuses, raises, and promotions. I once spent an entire month putting together lesson plans for an advanced Biology class only to be pushed aside by the football coach/black teacher with 1 more year seniority, to claim these classes and for me to be sent packing to work with the 'stupid' kids of low economic background and many learning and other disabilities, and low English proficiency. While that gave me an opportunity to really do good work with marginalized students and give them the tools to rise above their programming, it was demoralizing and no one, not one member of staff stood beside me. I was criticized for openly crying. Showing for ONCE, that I'm not a 'strong' woman.


In fact, my own brother told me I only got the job as a teacher, not because of my passion, education and talent, but because of the color of my skin and the box ticking exercise for diversity by the school district. What a slap in the face! As a veteran in the classroom, 8 years at various levels, and years of tutoring and helping out fellow classmates, that was such a vicious attack. Where can I run, when those come from the colleagues at work and within my own family?
Did I not deserve a chance? Or just because I'm darker skinned, and the daughter of immigrants, I should be denied? Or because I'm a woman, I should be in a less than position?


Yet instead of complaining, I took to teaching my marginalized and ignored students and treated them with RESPECT. I listened. I made interesting lessons. I got them to realize their power. I got them to speak up, to teach, to tap into their own genius. They, for the first time, had a teacher telling them they were not stupid, but in fact, they lived in an unfair system. That I cared about them. That they could succeed.


No matter what field I have gone into, that passion of mine, for integrity and equality and kindness has remained. I try, to remain optimistic, yet seek truth. I have courageously got out of bed and faced the world, where I am not seen as a whole person. In a world, where minorities are considered less than, 'other', and a person to be ignored and attacked.


I have even, like many minorities and marginalized, faced that mistreatment even within the safe spaces, or within the communities of color or ethnicities.

Even, or especially, in the world of personal development and small business ownership, I am marginalized, silenced, ignored, looked over and talked over routinely. When I ask, if it's because of race, I am denied or ignored.


I have watched my husband being attacked and ignored because of his disability, even by his so-called family and colleagues.


I have watched close friends (you know who you are) face ridicule because of health concerns and conditions at their work place and even ignored and denied by healthcare workers.
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I have seen my gay friends undergoing a constant barrage of attacks and microaggressions to the point they feel unsafe and unloved.


I have seen women, treated as slaves or worse, even in their own homes.

I have seen kids undergoing severe abuse, neglect and manipulation by those meant to protect them.


I have seen the poor and disadvantaged barely keeping it together, wondering where they will get money to continue.


I have seen white women, holding minority women and transwomen at a distance while further their own causes. It frankly makes me sick. Where's the solidarity?


THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE! I have had enough and I'm doing something about it.


When we don't speak of this, we create shame and silence and secrets. When we shine a light on these areas, we have a chance to recover ourselves, stand in our power, release the shame and rewrite our scripts and our lives. When we have these discussions that are difficult, it brings us together not further apart.
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That's exactly why I have created a video lecture on how the systems of oppression. How do they marginalize? How does our DNA and our indoctrination play a part in our life scripts? And most importantly, how to start to take YOUR power back.


Learn more about it here: http://www.manifestbydesign.com/fulfill-your-calling.html
And get in touch if you want to be part of the change for equality in your part of the world!

Oh, no, you're not crazy.


It's almost impossible, if you have spent any time in traditional schooling, watching any form of media, or lived in our society to come out without unconscious biases and indoctrinated to uphold or rail against the system. In fact, it is practically impossible. Here are a few chosen ones for your purview.

• When the school system indoctrinates us to learn a version of American history started with the white settlers & colonists, not that of the natives. These natives, made up of hundreds of unique tribes, have a rich heritage that is by and large ignored (and knowingly and systematically destroyed by the white settlers).
  
• Two female Prime Ministers meet to discuss pressing matters on their nation's policies regarding Brexit and the newspapers mentioned their legs, not their agenda.
  
• People around the world lament foreign sounding call center workers, yet neglect to acknowledge their country's part in colonialism and globalization, and their own greed for bargain basement prices and collusion for supporting slave & unfairly paid labor.
  
• Our gay brothers are being rounded up to be killed in Chechnya and governments are speaking up with a deafening silence.
  
• A message sent to all marginalized groups, regardless of field, country, or organisation by mostly white men: 'you're not good enough' all while you are working twice as hard for half as much, and juggling the constant barrage of microaggressions.
  
• Where migrants expect to be asked 'where they are from?' as a matter of course, even if they are natural born citizens, and feel the need to keep their passports close to hand to prove they are legal.
  
• In a world ruled by banks, where the poorest who can barely hang on keep having services cut, funding cuts and rely on food banks, but corporations benefit from tax breaks or avoidance and in fact benefit from vast government subsides.
  
• A black innocent, unarmed boy is murdered by the police, and the media mentioned he was a honor student, while a white male is mentioned as a swimmer before he is ever called a rapist by the same media.

As I said before, it is nearly impossible to have grown up in this society and not have faced this type of indoctrination. After your eyes have been opened, the next step is to decompress. Allow yourself to see the extent of the damage, the pervasiveness of your indoctrination and unfairness of the broken system. Allow yourself to feel the myriad of emotions that will rise within you. Begin to have the difficult conversations to share your truth in safe spaces and as you feel comfortable begin to speak in ever widening circles. By giving yourself space, you create more space for others to heal and speak. There is a great shame in these wounds, yours possibly, but definitely within wounds of the collective. Speaking about it brings fresh air, instead of more festering.

Silence breeds shame and begets more silence.

It is essential that you find reassurance that you are not crazy, your response is a natural reaction to an unfair situation. I’m here to reassure you, that you are not crazy. You are in fact as well adjusted as you can possibly be under the circumstances.

It's like walking through a one-way door, you'll never be the same. You won't ever heal to the place before your indoctrination and programming. That is impossible -- to unsee the seen. However, you'll be able to heal the pain, as well as stand in your power, stand in your truth, stand in the world in a new way.

Photo Credit: Frank Mckenna

Men can mansplain, be aggressive, interrupt, belittle, talk over, insult, be crass, or ask a pointed question yet he is considered direct, assertive, decisive, even an effective communicator.

Women may speak up and are considered pushy, aggressive, unladylike, rude, or even bi!@hy.

This type of double standard, of which there are countless examples, permanently keeps some people in the less than position. Make no mistake, it is a purpose-built system to give greater advantage to some but not all. This is the heart of the systematic oppression that has given us sexism, racism, ageism, discrimination, homophobia, xenophobia, elitism and so on. Stereotypes, discriminatory laws and policies, ethnocentrism, self-justifications, social norms and rationale reinforce these systems. 

It eclipses our inner power and inner truth. 

Now, I have said we are slaves within this system, it's often subtle so we don't recognize it. I have also said we are unconscious victims of it. That does not mean we have no power or we are stuck. Yes, I use polarized language because as a researcher, an educator, an editor, a rhetor, a partner, a parent, and a scientist I have seen, explored and even unwittingly indoctrinated others. I use these words because it gets people to wake up, because it is a part of the truth. But in truth we are also heros and heroines, warriors and lovers, and creators and storytellers. 

But my message has never been about fear or disempowerment, in fact, I have stood for empowerment, inspiration, courage, and liberation my entire life. It means that to actually create real lasting change, once we become aware of the programming, we can choose our next steps. We choose if we want to keep repeating the same patterns or leave them behind in order to create something new and fulfill our calling. But that part is completely up to you.

Systemic oppression resides within our histories, our attitudes, our beliefs, our actions, our perceptions, our language, our environment and most damaging of all it is stored within our DNA and epigenome. As long as one member of the human race is oppressed, we all  are oppressed. Even when we were all free of oppression, it would still have an impact, a challenge to rise above. We can rise above what is. We can take directorship of our life.

The eclipse need not be permanent. 

Because I am a warrior who will not settle for the status quo. But now with eyes wide open I empower individuals to rise above their programming, control their epigenetics, and fulfill their highest potential.

There is little doubt that our world has come out of balance.

• The Earth is in the middle of the 6th mass extinction.
• Politically and economically, we are more divided than ever.
• Our waters are polluted, our soils depleted, our forests disappearing, and our planet warming to almost beyond repair.
• We’ve forgotten about our roots, lost track of our food supply, our medical system seems to be more focused on profits than wellbeing.
• Consumption and power seems to trump compassion and enlightenment.
• Slave and child labor, human trafficking, and slave trades are still going strong, human rights violations seem to be the norm, not the exception.
• Marginalized groups live on guard, they regularly play on an unfair playing field and are discriminated based on factors other than equality.
• Corporate profits, government bureaucracy, citizen apathy and an overwhelming ‘pass the buck’ mentality reigns supreme.

The Hopi’s have a perfect word for it: koyaanisqatsi, life out of balance. These are signs of forgetting who we are as people, as spiritual beings in a human body. We’re no longer leading with purpose.

And yet.

There is perfection in this too. What can it show you? What can it show us, as a member of humanity?

And yet.

You were born for times like these.

Suffering and conflict are impacting the world.

And yet.

Here you are.

Being sick, being in war, being in suffering. Is there a purpose to it?

In my estimation, a resounding ‘yes’.

While there are many positive things happening, suffering teaches you how to be miserable a necessary skill to the true walker of the path. Mass numbers of people are suffering yet they are in the struggle for the sake of struggle. You pick the reasons: 3rd world problems like lack of proper sanitation or basic necessities, 2nd world desire for more, to live like the first world, and 1st world problems of being squashed in the race to the top and still not finding the peace they were looking for.
But even in the midst of the struggle, there is an opportunity to transcend the suffering. To rise above it. To live in such a way, that the struggle is non-existent.

There are 3 parts to this journey:

1. Struggle. Using suffering to make meaning of the situation. After you suffer, you look back to find meaning and use it to alter the course. It’s the very definition of a ‘rebel without a cause’.
2. Perseverance. Rising above the suffering. During the suffering, you find more positive ways of coping.  Think of the story of Cool Runnings or making lemonade out of the lemons that life provides you. Here you learn to distinguish between resistance of the flow of life and the obstacles that test your resolve and commitment.
3. Liberation. Moving to a place, a stance that involves no suffering, transcending the suffering. The realization that life is what you create, the power is within you, and no longer needing the story of suffering. It is surrender to what is, the death of the ego in order to reveal your true nature. It is the lighting of your torch that liberates and inspires others to pick up their own torches to light the world to liberation.

This is from one of the most powerful lessons for humanity, Richard Rudd describes this in the 38th & 39th Gene Keys. Learning to transcend the struggle and in doing so, finding true liberation. Living your life totally free, unshackled. Living life fully on your terms. Very few reach this level of transcendence because it is requires a level of mastery not readily accessible at the level of the mundane.

What is your path?

This is where most of us start the journey. A growing discontent that forces change. You either choose to follow your calling or continue the pointless struggle. This is the first step. It’s an act of courage to look back at your suffering and learn from it. Life changing realization and insight can dawn under such self-reflection.

The Struggle

Yet this use of hindsight is slow. Looking back over time not only wastes the present moments during the suffering, but looking back means you’re also missing out on the current moment—however beguiling it may be, it’s the shadow that resides within our collective psyche, the warrior energy that ranges from defeatism to aggression.
It’s like the proverbial grit within the oyster that creates the pearl. That suffering can often bring us to understand our gifts, get clarity on our calling and drive us to action. It’s an essential step in your growth. Elizabeth Gilbert succinctly shares: "I've never seen any life transformation that didn't begin with the person in question finally getting tired of their own bullshit."

Committing

In making this step, we as expressed by Stephen Pressfield, ‘The artist committing himself to his calling has volunteered for hell, whether he knows it or not. He will be dining for the duration on a diet of isolation, rejection, self-doubt, despair, ridicule, contempt, and humiliation.’ Realize this from the start. While he paints the picture to be rather dire and stark, it’s a journey to honor your own creative faculties, to manifest your life by design, rather by default.  

It's the hallmark of the persistence stage. You may find yourself reflecting on the following: Can you stand being alone with yourself? Can you stand feeling uncomfortable? Can you be like the oyster with a confound piece of sand that irritates you to finally get up and take action? Are you ready to be in the arena going for the prize?

Another huge hurdle is the very idea of competition. In reality, you’re not against someone else, you are following your own path, your own calling. This is one reason I have always loved individual sports. Yes, team sports have their place. Yet the individual athlete shows up and fights for the PB—the personal best.

Your calling asks that you get into the arena. You have to give up the ‘us vs. them’ mentality and realize the real battle is within.

Each time you get up and do your work, is a victory.
Each time you face your fears, is a victory.
Each time you focus on your work, not the result, is a victory.
Each time you act despite your fears, is a victory.

Finding Honour
This perseverance and commitment to your own success is essential to the next stage of transcendence. When you show up each day to fulfil your calling, you create the opportunity to transcend the struggle and reach honour. Giving up the struggle means understanding it is no longer about winning or losing, but playing the game, surrendering to the process.

At this level, you’re living as one with the rest of the universe. A realization emerges that what happens to one, happens to all, simultaneously. The ultimate level of responsibility to face what is yours, not just for you but for all of humanity. There ceases to be separation from live and death,

It ‘love so pure that it sacrifices itself without a thought to serve a higher aspiration’ a pearl of wisdom shared by Richard Rudd on the nature of honour in The Gene Keys.
The warrior, in all their shades, is one to create a better world, challenge the status quo, and commit to a purpose bigger than themselves. These stages, the warrior archetype shines through from the start of conflict, to the steadfastness in the face of resistance, to rising above the need for the win/lose dichotomy to a place of liberating others from their struggles. It’s the journey from finding your torch to the passing on the light to a fellow seeker, illuminating their journey. It’s the immortal nature of their story that stands the test of time, continuing to inspire the next generation of warriors.

On the finish line

"The danger is greatest when the finish line is in sight. At this point, Resistance knows we're about to beat it. It hits the panic button. It marshals one last assault and slams us with everything it's got," Stephen Pressfield, The War of Art.

As my track coach in high school said, ‘kick it in.’ Meaning give it your all as you make your sprint towards the finish line. No matter what, keep your eyes on the end goal.
It’s not the type of journey that can be completed in its entirety in a day or a season. Your calling is most likely a lifelong endeavour to fulfil. By its nature your calling involves showing up every day. The trek to the summit requires planning and the ability to withstand the conditions. It takes every bit of courage to rise to the summit. You finish one leg, camp and train for the next level. Each stage is a victory, but you’ve got to keep your eyes on the prize and remember the bigger picture.

What’s the bigger picture?
Liberation, to live your true potential without the shackles that bind us. Both the personal ones that are from our own programming or passed onto us from our family whether through genes, memes or environment, as well as the collective imprisonment through media, governance, corporations, propaganda and culture.
You break through and rise above your programming.
You find clarity and trust your own insight.
You give up your blindness of separation and ignorance and own your wisdom and power.

Ultimately, the conflicts, fears, and distractions that show up in the world only mirror those within. Showing up, facing them head on, committing to the assignment that you’re called to, and becoming a warrior of light is the only way to make progress. You’ll find peace within and without.

You have a choice to be miserable every day or live in the moment and find the peace. The chaos swirls around and there is calm at the center like a hurricane. Chaos doesn’t mean we cannot feel satisfied.

Just because there is struggle and chaos, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your live. It doesn’t have to stop us being happy or finding contentment. That part is up to us. We must learn to live in a duality one where we see the contrast between what we want and what we have, and yet be steadfast in the vision we want.

Ultimately, it’s up to you.
 
The war isn’t won with just you
You came here with an assignment, yet it is not only you that can overcome the collective manifestations of fear, anger and hatred. You have a specific design that gives you unique capacities and strengths.

Each of us must do our part. Each person and creature faces their resistance and joins the movement.

All the epics from the Mahabharata to the Iliad to the Lord of the Rings, share a tenet that the war is won by courageous individuals coming together as one chipping in their gifts and their strengths. They become partners to overcome the struggle. Slowly but surely, the tide turns. The chaos quelled and peace returns.

You have the power

You were born for this time.

‘And that soul moved aside so that this one could go forward, and one by one, each being stepped aside so that the souls with the finest possibilities of creating heaven on Earth could move to the forefront. And here you are! You made it in! And it's my job to remind you that you are the Ones….my divine purpose in this material kingdom is to actively embody this Oneness and live its unfoldment "down here",’ by Angela Peregoff from ‘The Morning Blessing.’

Yet living ‘down here’ means we do have the struggles and limitations of humanity. We forget our truth. Like all potentials within you, transcending your programming is completely up to you.

You have the power to change your epigenome, your thoughts, your environment, and your actions.

Over to You

Consider the following questions:

• What causes are you called to contribute to or participate in?
• Are some struggles in your life not worth it? Can you let them go?
• Perhaps you’re in need of clarity to change your perceptions, thoughts, beliefs, and actions.
• Where do you need to commit and squarely face your resistance?
• Can you face your resistance without reservation or hesitation?
• Are you ready to transcend your struggle and find ease, grace and honour on your journey?
• Who can you ally with as you pursue your calling? 

You’ve most likely heard, that you are your genes. By and large, our programming includes the disempowerment that each of us is victims to our genes. However, the opposite is true. In reality, the epigenome, the above the DNA, gives us complete control of how the DNA is read, interpreted and executed within our body. Epi-, meaning above, refers to the mechanisms of running the programming and blueprints within our cells.

In reality, you are the director of your life. You choose the script, the actors, the scenes. It’s up to you. You create your reality and have the power to rise above your programming and your DNA.

Imagine a world where all of humanity rose up simultaneously, to claim their birth right: full liberation and empowerment. What would be possible?

​That’s why I’m optimistic. Hopefully now, you are too. 

 Photo Credit: Diana Simumpande

Harlem

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?
-Langston Hughes

Many of us have dreams of serving the world, leaving a legacy of impact and leaving our mark. Or we want to have an experience of a lifetime, but life comes and goes, and the dream goes unfulfilled. It often seems so far off at times. 

We all start with the idea--fabulous, grand and meaningful. But then, we put it aside. Life steps in and changes plans but the dreams, as Langston Hughes shares in his poem Harlem, and Lorraine Hansberry captures in her play A Raisin in the Sun, the dream goes deferred. 
First I want to start by saying, dream deferment is a complicated situation, based on many factors.
1) circumstances in your environment
2) your own fears and internal resistance
3) criticism, judgement or opinions of others
4)  interruptions from others
5) excuses, justifications, rationalizations
 
 
All of these items have one thing in common. Resistance, with a capital ‘R’.
Stephen Pressfield, The War of Art shares powerful words:
“Remember our rule of thumb: The more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.

Resistance is experienced as fear; the degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance. Therefore, the more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us and to the growth of our soul. That's why we feel so much Resistance. If it meant nothing to us, there'd be no Resistance.”
These paths all lead to 2 choices, one that you heed the call despite, or in spite of the resistance. Or you ignore the call yet again and allow the resistance to distract you from the call.
What happens to you when you defer a dream?
Depression, PTSD, loss of hope to name a few. When you’re forced to give up on your passion or give it up under duress, it can cause physical changes to your brain. Your neurotransmitters change, the signals within the brain and to the rest of the body change. It can cause a listlessness, a lack of direction. You can feel a sense of loss or grief.
Perhaps you lose your way, not knowing why you are here and forgetting who you really are. It’s the makings of a crisis of meaning. One manifestation is the so-called dark night of the soul.
Even living in poverty or constant struggle effects the brain and its structures. These have long term implications on your epigenome and can have lingering effects from previous generations.
In short, it makes it harder to succeed in the future.
 
The science behind your choices
This choice point is paralleled in the brain’s own neural pathways.
As you’re probably aware, the subconscious runs the general programs. When you’re using your conscious brain to think, plan, visualize or contemplate, the subconscious runs the rest of the show. It runs us on autopilot. That autopilot is in the ‘on’ position, about 95 percent of the time.
If your neural networks have been practicing following your calling, facing resistance and being comfortable about being uncomfortable while you are focusing, that’s what will continue to happen when your subconscious runs the show. The opposite is also true.
Neurons that fire together, wire together. The more the specific pathway is used, the more it grows.
Your brain’s circuitry, is modelled on how the universe operates at it’s core. What we focus on, grows larger. What you regularly give your attention to, increases the affinity to that pathway and your brain, body and focus becomes more efficient and interested.
Alternatively, when you continually give up on your calling, complain, make excuses and choose the stance of victimhood, the corresponding network of neurons slowly faces attrition. When that pathway is no longer used, it is culled to make room for more of the complaints and actively looks for more reasons to complain or give up.
Bottom line: you become what you habitually do. And the more you do it, the more you’ll get good at it.
But Let’s be honest, It’s not always easy
Langston Hughes and many other pointed out the injustice of certain groups as they try to get ahead. In a Raisin in the Sun, the African-American family faces tough choices and systemic issues that make success more difficult. Make no mistake, historically, however far we have come, those hurdles still effect a larger percentage of society, than we admit to. This is in large part of this is the narrative of progress and the extent of the military-industrial complex/corporatocracy that rules the majority of the world. Minorities and those not conforming to the mainstream ways, are marginalized and their ideas and contributions do not benefit from the same advantages and weight as those who are in the so-called ‘mainstream.’
Psychologically, emotionally, and physically these structures cause damage to these marginalized individuals. It takes more courage and fortitude for these individuals to step out of their comfort zones authentically and more effort to overcome these systemic biases.
If you’re in this category of standing out because of your color, creed, orientation, gender, ability, belief, wealth, or education, then realize these structures might make following your calling more difficult. However, you can succeed. Overcoming these and other obstacles are part of your unique journey.
My own thoughts are: ‘if I was born this way, then I can succeed this way.’
Stop blaming and start taking responsibility
Instead of letting your dream be differed, I would love for you instead for you to take a moment and make these dreams a reality. Here’s some practical things to get you moving in the direction of your dreams.

A few ideas to get you started:

1) Start an account to fund your dream, aka a freedom fund. 

Take a part of your income and funnel it towards your dream. It doesn't have to be much. For those of you not used to doing this, start with setting aside as little as 1% or .5%. That means for £1 or 50p for every £100 you bring in. For many of us, we do not notice it. You can put it in a separate account or simply hold it in an envelope or jar. My advice: Keep it simple and consistent. Increase your commitment by guarding against spending and increasing the percentage saved.
2) Start saying ‘yes’ to your calling.
Make a list of activities that can take you in the direction of your calling. Each task should be simple and take about 10 minutes. Start each day by selecting one item to finish. This item is the most important task to complete for you. Each day you do this, is a way of saying ‘yes’ to your calling and wires your brain to see more possibilities and become more efficient at the task as you move forward. Celebrate your win and reset the bar tomorrow back at 1 item. My advice: do it within 5 seconds of your inspiration to bypass the resistance. And do it regularly until it becomes a habit. It’s just as important as brushing your teeth.

3) Eat to support your DNA, brain and wellbeing
Everyday your body is conducting necessary repairs, replacing old worn out cells and tissue and copying your DNA. You become what you eat, digest and assimilate, quite literally. Not only will fresh foods give you more energy than the processed counterparts, it’s tasty and more appealing. It’s like building a structure with low quality materials, you’ll also get a low-quality output and product. My advice: start crowding out the foods that are less than ideal with whole, fresh foods.
4) Say ‘No’ to resistance, clutter and distraction.
Just as it important to hardwire your brain to naturally say yes to your calling by overcoming the resistance, it is equally important to cull the habits, focus, thoughts, beliefs, relationships and things that take us in the opposite direction of your calling. My advice: take an inventory of your life and let go of the things that no longer serve you and your calling.
5) Get used to fear.
It’s impossible to make decisions and take action in the direction of your dreams when you are constantly in fear. Your brain and body can only focus on one item, protection from fears or perceived threats, or growth. Each time you focus on growth, you face the fear but shift your focus from fear to possibility. Perception is key. Change and growth require you to see fear in a new light, they are a part of the journey not a cause for alarm. My advice: Learn to listen to your fear, but take regular inspired action in spite of it.
6)  'Assume the feeling of a wish fulfilled'
This is a powerful quote from Neville Goddard. Start by finding out what it would feel like, in your body, if the wish were to be fulfilled. Would it feel different than your negative thoughts--surely! Feel it from the thoughts, the sensations and the emotions in your body. Memorize that feeling by focusing on it every day, as often as possible. In doing so, you not only activate your creative capacities, you unrehearse the old pattern and you build new neural networks in your brain. My advice: every morning before you start your day and the last five minutes before you fall asleep. Watch what happens and take note on what ideas, coincidences and synchronicities show up. 

7) Watch your thoughts, beliefs and perceptions.

Gay Hendricks talks about this in his phenomenal book, The Big Leap. We all have at least a few upper limits in our lives. The key is to realize that often these thoughts & impulses that come up are not real, but rehearsed states. The body wants it's chemical hit for the day and it goads us into feeling our usual way to keep us safe. When we step outside of that, expect resistance in it's myriad of forms. And Michael Neill shares in his book, Effortless Success, that a thought is like the weather. It flits by but we don't need to take it seriously. We have many thoughts, but a fair number are repetitive and come from our unchecked subconscious. My advice: Instead, notice your own patterns and find resources and a support system to help you through.
My final thoughts:
Don’t lose heart. You are the creator of your reality. You have the ultimate power. It’s your story that needs to emerge and you have a hand in the outcome.
Don’t let your dreams get deferred. Don’t wait for regrets to haunt you.
 
Over to You:
Do you have a dream deferred?
What will you do to allow yourself to dream, prioritize and act on that dream?
Why is that dream important to you?
Is some part of that dream already in your life or available to you?
What do you have to let go of to make room for you dream?
What have you been doing, thinking, believing, that keeps you from realizing your dream?